Trick 3 - The Disadvantages of Living

Ventus

To those whom are loved by the wind
Those who, loved by the goddess, seek
She descends with wings black and white, spread afar

All have the ability to soar the skies
Those, who have the biggest wings, fly the highest
Those, who fly the highest, fall the farthest

What love, what life, lives the flightless bird
Wings clipped, there are no dreams, no glory remains

Nothing shall forestall my return
To burn the sands, the dusk, the skies
I offer this to thee, this my silent sacrifice


Lesson 3: Destruction is a form of creation.

Trick 2 - Space Cadet. Pull Out.

I find myself conflicted. The more I think about my individual self, the worse it gets. Who am I? I have no answers. Am I the self I truly wish to be, or am I only what others will accept? I hunger. I hate. I envy. I lust. I need. I seek. Only basic facts I know of myself. Oh, to answer that question. To know. For I know that no one ever truly knows all of their self, but most at least have some understanding. But I cannot fathom one. Every time I find an answer, I reject it. I know that I am afraid to know the truth. For the me that I am could very likely be a lie. A stranger.

More and more I catch myself envying others. Especially those in intimate relationships or those with close friends. I want what they have. And I hate it. I never want to be dependent on others. Others will leave. And hurt. I only have myself to depend on. But still I lust for it. This makes me rage inside. The beast prowls, pushes itself against the bars of the cage and they bend. Such stupid, hypocritical thoughts. I do not want them. I will not allow others to break me like how I have seen it happen to others. I think them for fools. The snotty little hypocrite I am. I do not need others. Besides the end is absolute. And I will die alone.

Lesson 2: Everyone dies alone.

Trick 1 - Just Leave Your Shoes At My Doorstep

Today's a very special day.

This post is an enterlude to my blog. Just some shit that you may or may not know.

First off, about this blog....
Aright, I finally decided to give into the temptations of getting a blog, or rather revive my old blog, which only had two entries, one of which was really fucked up. Well, you won't see those around anyways so....
Just so you know, I'm not writing this blog so people will read it. I'm not writing it because I want to get attention. I am writing this solely for the purpose of thoughts. My thoughts. I don't have any expectations for this.
This will contain bits and pieces of my life. It will probably be random. One entry how I feel, the next a rant, the next a random story. But whateves.

I gotta notion to say what doesn't feel right.

Second, a little bit about myself...
I am a girl, I am in high school, the fact that I have a blog does not make me emo or scene or goth or any shit like that.
I do like Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Star Trek, anime, manga, comics, and to read. And if that makes me a geek or a nerd, then I'm happy to be one. And I am not going to change because of what people think. I like what I like.
I do not enjoy the bandwagon jumping tweeny bopper that make up at least half of the population of my school. That does not mean I hate the world or people. ...Well.... I do kinda hate how stupid people are, including myself, by nature. But I do have friends.
I don't pretend that I have the worst life ever. Of course it could be better, but who wants a perfect life anyway? How fucking boring would that be? I know that there are millions of people that have it worse than me.
And with that said I believe that I am truly happy with my life.

Are you moving much to fast? And the good times that just don't last, If you're always on the go, Make an angel in the snow, And freeze.

Lesson 1: Everyone can fly. Everyone has wings. Those who fly in the sky have a risk of falling. The bigger your wings the higher you fly. The higher you fly the bigger the fall. Perhaps this is why some birds are happy not to fly.

Track 1: Blues Drive Monster - The Pillows